(singing)These are the people in your neighborhood.....

Birdy will appreciate this. In college he and I made up names for people that would descibe them or the situation we knew them from. ex: "The Girl that tried to kill us" was some chick that tried to brain us with a broomstick handle for some reason. We'd actually use the name like that.
Steakbellie: "Who was at the party?"
Birdy: "The girl who tried to kill us, Lion-O, the Big Boss Woman, Slut Cheryl, Evil, Spinckter Lips and Dave.
Steakbellie: "No 50-foot Mary? I saw her in Arrow Beard's class with the battered wife, Spicy, and the homeless lady. She said she would come later with Sean-Penn-Face"

"50 foot Mary" was this chick that was incredibly hot from a distance, and as she walked closer to you, you needed more beer. She was very nice though.

There was even a girl we called "The Girl We Remember" although I dont remember WHY we called her that.

There's alot more but I think you get the idea. The problem was, that it was like 'twin-language' between us. We'd talk like that, and then couldnt communicate it to other people, because neither of us could remember their real names.

I've kept up the tradition out of habit and boredom. I've found that I've named alot of people on my commute:

Nates Clone: This guy is a dead ringer of a friend of mine...except he's got this huge beard. I told my friend about it and asked if he had a brother or something. I've even brought a camera to try to get his photo, but like a Sasquatch, he seems to know and doesnt show up.

Ugly Barbie: This girl is a young girl who dresses like Barbie or the chick from Leagally Blonde When she takes off her glasses you realize she's missing some chomosomes or something.

Gumshoe: This guy looks EXACTLY like he should be in a 1940's Detective Movie. The Hat, The Suits, Suspenders, Bowtie, even the way he has his moustache. His whole freaking waredrobe is 1940's and impecably clean!

Unfortunate Nose, Ugly Hat: Ugly girl who carries enourmous hardback books and has the same frumpy hat in 16 different colors.

Iman: This is the cross dressing black man I wrote about recently. She looks like Iman, but I just realized how perfect the name is "I-Man"

8-Ball: This Spanish guy that is 4 foot high, 4 foot wide, shaved bald and sweating like crazy

Skeletor: She was one of the first Blog article I ever wrote! I LOVE skeletor!

I'll add more as I remember them....

***UPDATED JULY 27, 2005***

I remembered a bunch more identities from the college era, here are some of the good ones:
R.E.M: This was a chick that JuneBug brought home from a party. Like good suitemates we sat in the hallway and listened to them have sex. During the heat of passion she requested he put on some R.E.M.

Madonna with the long Neck: This was a girl who was very pretty and tall, but she had this enourmous neck that would crane around. Birdy had gone to High School with her but of course he couldnt remember her name. So we named her after a famous painting by Parmigiano (1534). She was always working out at the Rec Center and had huge muscular thighs. She could have been Madonna with the big thighs too.

IZZY THE NOSE: This was a little Indian girl with this HUGE nose. I think she started as 'The Nose' and somehow that turned into 'Izzy the Nose' and after awhile we just called her 'Izzy'. Nobody knew what the hell we were talking about.

Feets: This guy was amazing. I just realized that I need to devote an entire article to him. There are just too many things to say about him. God, I'm laughing...

Lothar of the Hair People: This was a suite-mate of ours who also deserves a full article, but I will not show him that amount of respect. I used to go to church with him on Sundays during my Freshman year, he had the frizziest hugest afro and white man has ever had. He listened to REALLY bad glam rock, and had this Rock-n-Roll ballad scream he would do. We'd ask him to do it all the time. He was taller than me and with the afro, taller then...well very tall. We called him Lothar to his face and eventually everyone called him Lothar, and he probably had to change his liscence to say 'Lothar'.

Lothar was the only guy in the whole building that had his own computer with him. He would invite people into his room to fill out this extensive survey that was supposed to give you some kind of personality analysis. It asked over 100 very personal questions, so he'd leave the room when people filled it out. When they were done he'd print out their analysis and they'd leave. As soon as they were gone, he'd go into the program and read all of their 'confidential' answers!

Cheese on Fries Guy(s): This is what the whole campus called him. He was an older Mentally Retarded type guy who worked for the school Cafeteria. He stood behind the bin of fires in his little white paper hat and said "Cheese on Fries?" to every passing person. He'd ladel a big ol' puddle of hot fake cheese-food upon your fires. He was short and had a mangy mustache and I really liked him. Somebody once told me he had an identical twin and sometimes it was the twin standing there.

Anyone that we actually knew the name of, we added a modifyer to...Grateful Dave, Elder Dan, Swimmer Brad, Sweet Lou, Harry get out of my food.