Monday, April 17, 2006

MWM ISO M for Fistfighting - 35

I'm a 35 yr old married father of three with a stable job and own my own home. I'm thoughful, caring and passionate and like to garden. I am 6'1" 210lbs and in decent shape and have brown hair and blue eyes.

I'm in search of a male age 24 - 40 (race unimportant) for several brutal fistfights in scenic Philadelphia locations. Please be diease and drug-free (alcohol is ok, as one of our fights will be a drunken brawl in Philadelphia's Irish Pub) I dont have any recent fighting experience so please dont reply if you are trained in Martial Arts. Also I dont mind getting hurt, but try to avoid punching me in the teeth, I'm not really into that. Other than that just be willing for me to try to kick the living shit out of you.

My ideal fistfight would start with clever insults escalding to chest-out intimidation and physical threats. Moms will be insulted. Once the first punch is thrown, it should have a mix of ground combat and traditional boxing, FOLDING CHAIRS OK. I'm not looking for a 30 second brawl but more of a serious smash-up where everything breakable is broken.

Some of my ideas include fighting on the elevated train platform on Market Street
(whilst wearing suits with briefcases and crashing newspapers vending machines down onto the live tracks) and at the Philadelphia Museum of Art (they have a Wyeth show going on right now that I would love to see/fight at) The melee could spill out the front door and the winner can stand at the top steps for the Rocky Dance.

Serious Inquiries Only.

10 comments:

Katrocket said...

Never before in my life have I wished I was a 24 to 40 year old male. I know that some men have hang-ups about fighting girls, but I suspect it has less to do with "respect" and it's all about with the fear of losing to a woman.

I may not have a penis, but I'll bring you a cake in the shape of a penis if it means I can clean your clock. I think it would make a dynamic prop as well. Everyone loves a food fight gone bad.

So look me up after a few practice rounds with the boys. (sounds like you'll need it). I'm totally in for the Wyeth show.

Birdy said...

I'm in for seeing Steakbellie eat a Penis Cake in 5 minutes flat.

steakbellie said...

I dont mind getting my ass kicked by a woman, otherwise I wouldnt have stayed married for almost 13 years. Just dont expect me to go easy becasue you're Canadian....

steakbellie said...

ha!

Katrocket said...

haha! Nah, I expect you to treat me with the same grit-toothed disgust that you have for your own countrymen. I hope you expect me to be punch-drunk.

hey - penis cake would be a very entertaining eating contest!

steakbellie said...

Somebody needs to alert the IFOCE!!!!

SRF said...

I can fly out for a few days. We measure up nicely, it should be a bloodbath. No hitting my face or teeth, deal?

Chris said...

Dood. Anger management. I'll sit on the floor and chant "Oohhhmmmmm" and think good and peaceful thoughts for you.

If that doesn't work, I wanna see pictures! (Not pictures of the penis cake - pictures of the melee.)

groovygrrrl said...

can i just hit you a few times and get out some frustration? :)

steakbellie said...

SRF
Deal
SB