Thursday, August 14, 2008

My Very Own Olympiad


Butterfly
Originally uploaded by steakbellie.
This Olympics is going well for me. I've actually stayed up and watched almost every performance by Michael Phelps, which is pretty incredible because I've hated the Olympics for a LEAST a decade.

They turned me off when the American Teams started allowing it's Professional Athletes to compete, and we all know that our Professional athletes are douche-bags.

Even if we get less medals I'd rather see some poor sot from Duluth represent us after forgoing a Professional Career and Money to fullfill an Oylmpic Dream. Show me some American Idealist who has had to get by on packs of Ramen Noodles and Slim Jims. Someone who will be really crushed when they come in 4th because they devoted their whole lives to this moment. Show me THAT guy, I'll cheer for him.

Our Pros are already having a good life and dont need more success or accolades. Screw Kobe Bryant, Screw the whole US Basketball Team, give the anonymous kids their shot.

I cant help but think that swimming should have more violence in it however. You should be able to reach over the lane rope and punch that Japanese guy in the eye to try to fill his goggles with water. There's currently no Defense in swimming and that is bad.

I'm also interested in bringing Competitve Eating into the Oylmpics. Of course for completely self serving reasons. It would be 16 days of free food for me and a chance to puke on International TV. Think of the medal ceremony with 3 guys barely able to stand on the podium, sweating in discomfort. THATS a great sport. 2012? I'm already training.

3 comments:

Chris the Hippie said...

I agree. I'm an Olympics junkie, or at least I was when I was a kid... Now? Not so much.

Why was it so special that the U.S. Hockey team won the gold in 1980? Because they were all a bunch of 19-year-old college kids... Why is it not so special that the U.S. Basketball team is winning? Because, like you said, it's Kobe Bryant. I find myself cheering for Upper Mongolia and Wheresthatistan, hoping they'll score over the U.S. in an underdog moment.

Used to be if you were a professional athlete in ANY capacity you were banned from the Olympics. If you got a $5 hotel room in 1911 to play baseball, you could NOT compete on the U.S. track team.

Ah well.

Leonesse said...

I have been a lifelong lover of the Olympics and I, too, am no longer enthralled. To hear of the bribery, oh, excuse me, lobbying it takes to get them and how politicized it all is, well, I have blogs to read and I'll read it all at the end of the day.

I caught a news documentary on the training of the Chinese gymnasts beginning as early as 6. If that isn't child abuse, I don't know what is.

Anonymous said...

Slim Jims & Ramen?

Not U.S. Olympians.

I'm an Olympics Junkie... always have been.

NBC did one of their special stories...Dana Torres spent over $100,000/year on her training. All picked up by sponsors.

Another good NBC special story... Lauryn Williams - Miami, Big House, Big Car, Big Dog.