If any of you find find my body (eight words)
Call 911 FIRST
Call the Olsen Twins SECOND
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I hate award shows and people who say 'fiance' too much.
I have three beautiful sons that are lucky enough to look like their Mother. I spend all of my time with those little bastards. I'm rated 18th in the World for Competitive Eating. It makes my Mom nervous, she thought I was going to be a Doctor.
I like the smell of Gasoline
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One of my favorite things is when my wife comes home with a bunch of trashy tabloids and we lay in bed with a glass of wine and laugh at Britney Spears.I hate award shows and people who say 'fiance' too much.
Blog Archive
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2008
(263)
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January
(14)
- say 'weeee' (eight words)
- details
- for you (eight words)
- from the ether
- From the Ether
- If any of you find find my body (eight words)
- 30 minutes in February (American Sonnet)
- New SB Logo?
- No title
- The Gaps You Dont See
- Staging My Own Writers Strike (eight words)
- but isnt it? (eight words)
- truckin (haiku)
- back to work
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January
(14)
Disappointed Readers
Blogs Worth Your Time
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Do You Know Where You Are Right Now?8 years ago
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QUICK THOUGHT FROM THE KILIMANJARO MARATHON10 years ago
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Blog Moved!11 years ago
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The Album Game12 years ago
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Al Sharpton, "Keeping it Real"?12 years ago
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And The American Idol Finale Winner Is...12 years ago
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Wha?14 years ago
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Hey Everybodddeeeeyyyyyy15 years ago
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Indexed is moving!16 years ago
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Competitive Eating Links
Shhh...They Are Sleeping....
Bucket List
- * Stand on a Glacier
- * Make Pickles
- * Wrestle in an Open Wrestling Tournament
- * Run to Work (about 10 Miles)
- * Take my family to Germany
- * Bike 200 Miles in a Day
- * Get in a Fistfight
- * Do a Pullup
- * Qualify for the Nathans Hot Dog Finals in Coney Island on July 4th
- * WIN an IFOCE sanctioned eating contest
- * Do 100 Pushups without stopping
- * Make Wine
- * Eat 40 Hamburgers in 8 Minutes
- * Brew my own Beer
- * Bench Press My Weight
- * Weigh less than 200lbs
- * Go to New Zealand
- * Go to Wisconsin
- * Go to Scotland
- * Run a Marathon in under 4 hours
Bucket List (done)
Labels
- haiku (204)
- Eight Words (174)
- Competitive Eating (110)
- All Apologies (36)
- American Sonnet (18)
- From the Ether (9)
- Bucket List (2)
- Rey Mysterio (2)
- 9-11 (1)
- King Tut (1)
- Treasures of Tutankhamun (1)
6 comments:
If you find me alive, call Olsen twins first.
funny! and oh, so true.
What if I'm already on the phone with the Olsen Twins when I discover your body?
I think, perhaps, you may be channeling poor Mr. Ledger. [I can picture him in the afterlife cursing at the massuese "Dumba$$...911, not MK...911...I could've made it...."] Your post is funny, but I don't like laughing at death.
So I will honestly add too true, as Wendy said.
I know they're my ICE contacts in my cell phone.
OMG, this is why I love reading your blog! You're just flat-out FUNNY! Thank you for the laugh!
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